Last month, I wrote the following explanation for the break I took from blogging:
“In the next 12 days, I will be preparing for The Professor’s birthday (it’s an important task to make a December birthday boy feel special), finishing Christmas to-do’s, packing almost all of our belongings into storage, and moving out of our home.”
What I didn’t realize at the time was that I was going to add six more things to that list: find a lump in my breast, visit my OB/GYN, get rushed over to my first mammogram, have a follow-up ultrasound, grimace through a breast biopsy, and get diagnosed with breast cancer.
That’s right, folks…
After the initial shock died down enough to even begin to process this news, I started wondering about things like how (and when!) I should go about telling people that I have breast cancer. Of course, the people that I was most concerned about were my little ones. Once we did the research and found the best way to talk to the kids about my diagnosis, we decided to make the news public with our family and friends. Once the cat was out of the bag, I started thinking about this blog, knowing that I was approaching the deadline that I set for myself to get back into the blogging routine.
Do I blog about my cancer?
I thought long and hard about the answer to that question. Before starting this blog, I had a mental checklist of things I was willing to share publicly and things that I wanted to keep private (such as the names of my family members). I must say, a serious illness was not included in this mental checklist because it wasn’t on my radar. Not. Even. Close. To help me decide if I wanted the details of my illness to be included on this public platform, I reminded myself of the three reasons why I started this blog.
- To document my family’s journey
- To share information that might be helpful to you awesome readers
- To push myself to find more fun ways to savor time with my family
Then I considered how publicly sharing details about my cancer journey would help me achieve the goals and overall vision of Mommy Standard Time, if it would at all. After a lot of consideration, I finally decided that I would include my cancer journey on this blog. Here’s why:
Document My Family’s Journey: I think that this reason is obvious. Blogging about this upcoming hurdle will definitely document a difficult part of my family’s journey. I will be sharing several posts about my diagnosis and journey to-date in the next few days, so the blog might be a little “cancer heavy” at first. Then I plan on tapering off to a weekly update. Couldn’t I just write about it in a personal journal? I absolutely could (and I am)! My reasons for going public with the details are next…
Sharing Helpful Information: Part of me thinks that doctors should revoke patients’ googling privileges when they are given a diagnosis. The internet can be a scary place when you start looking up stories of people going through the same medical challenges as you. HOWEVER, it can also be a wonderful source of comfort and information if you look in the right places. I am currently in the stage of reading mainly American Cancer Society and NCCN documents online, but the few blogs that I have found written by young women with breast cancer have given me some tidbits that I plan to refer back to if needed (like a pattern for a drain apron. Who knew??). I don’t know if what I have to say about my journey will be helpful to anyone, but it could be. So I’ll give it a try. A word of warning to those of you who know me personally: I might go into more detail on the blog than I would if we were speaking in person. As a lady who likes details when I’m reading blogs, I will be providing the types of descriptions and pictures that I am currently seeking out on other blogs. If reading about my boobs will make things uncomfortable for you when we pass each other in the supermarket, then you might want to stay away from my cancer-related blog posts. 🙂
(A little overwhelmed by information after a phone call with the cancer center.)
Savoring Time: The overall goal of my blog is to push myself (and hopefully others) to find more time to spend with family (and more fun ways to savor that time). Obviously, this goal is put even higher on my priority list after receiving my diagnosis. I guess cancer has a way of opening your eyes to how you spend your time. I will continue to blog about time-saving tips and time savoring ideas that I find helpful in my current phase of life. Some will probably be cancer-related and some will not.
Overall, the super fun goals that I had for my blog this year are being put on the back burner for now. My posting schedule will probably be a little unpredictable. But I’m okay with that. There’s always next year.
And next year, Santa had better bring me something a whole lot better than cancer!
Keep Reading – – > Discovering My Tumor
LovE you Stephanie. You can do hard things although i wish it to beso.